We always have another relapse in us but; we don’t always have another recovery in us.

Instagram: mikefiore118

What is your name:

Michael A. Fiore the CEO & Founder of #INSPIRE2INSPIRE

Drug of Choice: Opiates and Cocaine

If you’re not sober, what is the main reason you’d like to get sober?

I want to Live. All my life all I have done is live to exist, now I know I exist so I can Live a Life. I want to know what I can accomplish in life without drugs. I want to make the people that I hold close to my heart proud of me and to restore dignity to my family name as well. I’m also passionate about helping others especially drug addicts, by setting the example that recovery is possible, and it will be possible once it is possible for me. I need to model what I preach right?

Describe your experience as an addict:

My life was pure chaos; nothing was controllable or under my own will anymore. The drugs were in control of everything in my life, my decision making, experiences and multiple failed relationships (mainly family relations). This was frightening because I thought I would never make it out of that hole I dug for myself, I thought the drugs would control my life forever. At the same time, there was this twisted convolution in my mind because the drugs brought comfort to me as if they were my best friend. What I mean by this is, it was something I could count on, something I could rely on because it was always there. Drugs were like a familiar friend to me, like someone I knew from way back when in high school. In the end, I felt like I was standing in quicksand; the harder I tried to get out, the deeper I sank. And that’s what lead to my desperation to want to get off the drugs and get into rehab.

When did you realize your life had become unmanageable?

The catalyst was when my father died. I loved and still love that man. The pain was too much for me bare alone, and so I went to his funeral high on the 13th of November 2009. The last time I was sober was two weeks before his funeral. Percocets were the friends I brought with me. (And I was also high when I was at the hospital visiting him before he died.)

After all this, is when the dam broke and the water burst out and every day - and I had to be high. It’s how I coped with the suffering.

As a matter of fact, I had no idea just how high I was all the time until I had to answer this question.

What does your recovery look like?

It feels like fighting in a 15 round heavyweight boxing fight, and then running the New York City marathon right after. I don’t see recovery as something that will ever end, I see it as something that will stay concurrent. Because if it ends then I will lose focus, and it may lead to another relapse.

We always have another relapse in us, but we don’t always have another recovery in us.

To die is to gain. What that means is; I need to die to my old self (i.e. Mike the drug addict) so that I can gain a new Life. And live in the name I have been given since my birth: Michael A. Fiore.

So I am going to fight, and I am going to win once and for all.

How are you doing these days?

I am better than yesterday and even greater than where I was 5 years ago that’s for sure. Slow-motion is better than no motion, and I am taking each day; one hour at a time.

What do you do to maintain sobriety?

I am currently living in a rehab facility on the LES of Manhattan... it kind of speaks for itself no? All day and each day, I attend groups and meetings, building a support network with addicts, and also a support network with people who aren’t addicts. Because if I want to live a clean and sober life, it would be wise to hang around clean and sober people right? I do my best to exercise daily for the natural endorphins, and to sleep better at night - I also came up with my own recovery method that I titled: The O.C.A, which I follow (and you can hit me up on Instagram to find out what that is).
                At the end of the day, I try not to get too high on the highs and not too low on the lows - I’m always finding an emotional equilibrium to this recovery process because it’s just hard man.

Any advice you would give to newly sober folks?

Find people who are having success in recovery. Watch and look, observe their path but don’t make their path your own. Just use it as a measurement to show your own growth track. Stay in your own lane, but it doesn’t mean you can’t have others walking beside you. It’s important to have a solid support network, so that you have people keeping you motivated, encouraged, and if you fall at least you will have people there to pick you back up. Bad company corrupts good character, so it’s also important to have the right people in your support network and not just anyone.

Obstacles aren’t meant to deviate us from the path they are a part of it. Consider obstacles as a strengthening tool to help you persevere. No one said this would be easy, but it is possible.

Regardless of our circumstances, the substance(s) of choice, or the bad habits that turned into a chronic behaviour that resulted in a bad addiction - it was all a coping mechanism for the emotional and psychological trauma and suffering we experienced. We were hurting, and we didn’t want to hurt anymore; but after a while, we need to stop making excuses for our choices and take accountability for what we have done, the people we have hurt, and the road we have paved ourselves.

Recovery is your own personal journey, and no one can walk it but you.

So make a decision today and choose; Life.